Guys, libraries are the bomb-diggity.
As the blissfully ignorant, popsicle-stained tot that I was, I frequented my local library for story hour or afternoon jaunts to pick up some sweet books on tape (Clifford, anyone?) with my mom and sister. However, it wasn’t until I was older and became painfully aware of the “there’s-no-such-thing-as-a-free-lunch” world that we live in that I truly learned to appreciate the phenomenon of libraries.
So, here are some reasons why we need I think we should show these fine institutions a little more love:
1. Getting a library card is totally free. So, right off the bat, it’s an excellent deal. It’s like the library is saying to you, “Here you go! You get all these wonderful books for free! Whenever you want! Here’s a cool little card that indicates that!” Thanks, library. That’s super nice of you. You rule.
2. Libraries don’t just have stinky, old books. They have new books. Brand new books. That book whose release you’ve been anticipating for the last few months? You don’t have plant yourself in a particularly well-concealed corner of Barnes & Noble to read it because you’re too broke to actually buy it. You can get it from your library FOR FREE. And read it wherever you damn well please. Out in the open. With no shame. Hell, maybe even with a refreshing iced latte. Pairs fabulously with guilt-free literary enjoyment.
3. If for some reason your local library doesn’t have the book you want, you can order the next available copy from your region’s network of bomb-ass libraries to be delivered TO YOUR LOCAL LIBRARY FOR PICK UP. You will also be notified of its arrival via email or phone, so you can retrieve it at your earliest convenience. Where it will be waiting for you, shining like a beacon of hope in this cruel, outrageously expensive world.
4. Didn’t get to a book yet and it’s due tomorrow? Renew that shit. Boom, three more weeks. Still didn’t get to it? Renew it again. Renew it as many times as you want!!! Okay, actually, most libraries have a renew limit, but you can still manage to have a book out for a good chunk of time.
5. Oh, phooey. You missed the due date for your book and now it’s late. Well, good thing it’s only a fee of 5 cents per day. That they never make you pay. If that fee shows up on your account the next time you go to check out a book and you don’t have any cash on you, they’re all like, “It’s no problem. Just pay it next time. Pay it whenever.” Thanks, librarians! If you could maybe have a word with the landlord and the student loan company and perhaps persuade them to adopt your business philosophies?? That would be cool??
6. Libraries are just chill. They offer tons of community activities (like the before-mentioned story hour) that are once again, free. They’re also just nice places to hang out if you need to clear your head or kill an hour between errands. And who doesn’t love sniffing all those books? Come on, you’ve sniffed a book or two in your life. And enjoyed it.
In conclusion, big shout to libraries for existing. Four for you, libraries, you go, libraries. If you are not yet convinced of the quality and convenience of libraries, I really just don’t know what to tell you. Now, get off your butt and go enjoy some free, book-filled funtivities.